Oh, what is the use of shame. Very little from what I can tell. Shame imprisons us. It keeps us bound to destructive secrets that erode our ability to form intimate relationships and live up to our fullest potential.
I am aware that some people find shame to be very useful. When I was younger there were appeals to bring shaming back into American culture. I suspect William Bennett was a major driver of this movement. His argument came at a time when day time talk shows began competing to see who could broadcast the freakiest guests. Perhaps some people saw reviving a culture of shame as better than having to turn off their television sets. Maybe other people saw this revival as having the potential to advance progressive causes. It’s tempting to believe that we could reform naughty corporations by harnessing the power of shame, but since they have none, it’s really not a very effective tactic. In fact, shamelessness pays off very well for the rich and powerful. Maybe the rest of us should try it.
Shamelessness does not have to equal arrogance. My magical colleagues are renowned for getting around dualistic brainwashing. When mainstream culture tells us that shame and arrogance are the only possibilities, we invoke Pride, a third road that cuts through false choices. True Pride. Healthy Pride. What fills you with pride?
